If you’ve not yet heard of Wolfram|Alpha, you just haven’t been reading up on enough of those scientific internet applications recently. It is, in my opinion, one of the most useful and incredible breakthroughs in dynamic input interpreter (or “search engine”) technology since Google. Bing’s got nothing on this shit1.
Wolfram|Alpha is this service I’ve been using for several weeks, perhaps more, and it is by far the single most useful computational knowledge engines I’ve ever used, and maybe the first! Stephen Wolfram’s goal with Alpha is essentially to make the world’s knowledge quantifiable and search-able, and condensed and consolidated into a database able to receive a single input string.
Second, I love the design. Alpha’s website is simple and intuitive, bringing the viewer’s eye towards the input field, and secondarily towards the list of examples. On a results page, the data is loaded dynamically, and although it’s not immediately available in plain-text, it’s clear that this is necessary. Obviously they are loading information in such a way that enhances speed and accessibility.
Lastly, the interpreter is very intelligent. Most coherent input strings can be read and interpreted pretty well, regardless of syntax. Before you even take a look at all of the examples, you can probably guess at some of things that can be entered. Try “etymology anxious” or just “anxious” or even “what are broader terms for the word tuna?” You can query an object — the word anxious — or, in addition limit information, such as the etymology. In addition, you can type in two queries separated by a comma (such as “Pluto, Neptune“), and Alpha will format and compare the two entities dynamically. The interpreting power of Wolfram|Alpha can only be surpassed by its computational power and sheer bulk of data.
All Wolfram needs now is a comprehensively featured and useful desktop client.
1Technically speaking, Bing has nothing on anything. “Decision engine?” It doesn’t even make decisions! It’s just Google, with less influence and ability, a superfluous design, and a distinct need to actually advertise their services. On TV! Television, for Christ’s sake!
Do you get tired of reading our posts all the time? I bet you do! Here are some links to awesome cultural supernovas currently residing on the webernets.
Do you like the same pictures talking about topics ranging from Schopenhauer to lesbians? If you do, and you haven’t read Dinosaur Comics, I not only pity your soul, but suggest you read some of theseclassicgems.
Historical humor (not a very deeply plumbed niche) executed in a delightful drawing style? Enter Kate Beaton, authoress of Hark! a Vagrant. Being a fan of Poe, this one was particularly LMFAOROFL.
True, it’s a bit 90’s, but I’m ok with that. If you want obscure references and obscene mash-ups of every meme from “yo dawg” to “mudkips”, check it out, but be warned that it’s N always SFW.
So, my friends, feast at the table of the tuboblag!
I don’t know about you, dear readers, but I was as excited as a baby kangaroo taking gymnastics lessons from a tiger to see the two-hour House season 6 premiere, and I thought that it delivered with the full scripting and acting genius that I’ve come to expect these last 5 seasons, though I have some doubts about the future.
House and some crazy guy that we'll probably never see again.
Now, obviously the show House is about, well, Greg House and his personality. House’s quirky ways are really the essence of the show, as he is a character that we can relate with and be repulsed by at the same time, the dynamic that makes the show as great as it is. In fact, this premiere plays on that more than any so far, since, having been with House for 5 years or so, we know how he works and acts, and expect heavy emphasis on these things. However brilliant Hugh Laurie’s portrayal of this cynical, peoplephobic doctor is, though (and it is brilliant), House (the show and the character) really shines through the interactions between the titular doctor and other people. The most ingenious, and entertaining, device of the show is the way in which the writers have secondary characters react to House’s alternately absurd, tragic, pathetic, and admirable traits.
Unfortunately, the show’s premise and character-developing banter has grown to be, while still well-executed and insightful, a bit predictable. For example, whenever House hatches some crackpot plan to cure the patient, the most likely reactions are: Foreman sighs, Thirteen cries in outrage at first but then submits to House, the late Kutner happily signs on, and Taub looks indifferent. Of course, the other characters have to get involved too, involving such shocking developments as: Cuddy refusing to allow House’s treatment (which he ultimately gets around), Wilson giving House good advice that he doesn’t follow, Cameron trying to distance herself from the situation, and Chase looking generally confused.
Because of this, I thought that one of the best things that the show could have done, and the best thing that the show did during the premiere was to introduce a new and untested plethora of characters. When House spends most of his time around the same group of people, the personality insights tend to run out, the only source of new intellectual stimulation usually being the patients, who are generally not very smart. In the premiere, not only was House thrown into a building with at least eight new personalities, but few or none of them had any preconception of House going in. This opened up new avenues of development for the character, as he isn’t used to people attempting to approach him in an amiable of even compatriatic way. And in this case, instead of House wholesale dismissing the characters, through the course of the program he begins to open up, to build relationships, and to help people. In essence, House starts to feel good about what he does, a major change to the series, and one that I hope keeps.
Dr. Nolan, head of Mayfield Psychiatric, has seen it all before.
The most moving and effective character was Dr. Nolan, the head of the pysch ward, who is not only as stubborn and resilient as House, but is about as intelligent as well. House isn’t used to having his cage rattled by an equal, and this let Hugh Laurie expose some emotional context that helps us understand our favorite mysanthropic doctor a bit better.
The rub is, I’m not sure how long this innovative and welcome change is going to last. At the end of the double-episode, House is in fact released from the ward back into the free world, a development I did not expect, having thought that the creative team would keep him in the ward for at least a few more episodes. The reason this doesn’t sit well with me is that we just lost to the closed halls of the crazy house a multitude of dynamic and new characters that were in many cases in a position to become an important part of the show. Because of this, nex week we will see House interacting with the same seven people he’s always hanging around with, and will lose a lot of the novelty and uncertainty that was felt in the premiere. In addition, it seemed to me that the previews of next weeks episode looked like the same old House again, which disheartens me, as I wanted to at least see this newer, slightly altruistic, happy-ish House show his new self to his posse. I hope that they manage to maintain his newfound attitude though the drudge of medical mystery and misery that is sure to abound in the season to come.
All in all, the House premiere was a fresh take and welcome change on an amazing show that is managing to age extremely gracefully, and in fact get better and fresher with time - let’s just hope the production team has the nerve to stick with their guns through what promises to be an interesting and certainly surprising season.
I don’t want this to be long, but I have to tell you that I rely heavily on the wonderfully versatile application for OS X known as Quicksilver, which allows me to quickly launch applications, send emails, navigate through folders, operate iTunes, and perform most other simple tasks. I am so dependent on this utility that I’m often frustrated by most other computers’ lack of launcher applications.
Anyway, if you are on a Mac, download Quicksilver now. It will change the way you work, and you will get so much more done. Muscle memory has never been so much fun! If you’re on Windows or Linux, check out Launchy (cross-platform), Skylight (Windows only), or Gnome Launch Box if you’re running Gnome. If these don’t work for you, search the Linux repositories or simply Google “quicksilver alternatives.” Good luck, and happy launching!
If there is one symbol universally accepted across the West as a symbol of hate, it is the swastika. However, as many of you may already know, this emblem has a rich history, used in nearly every major culture prior to the Third Reich. Once I had learned of the Nazi’s distortion and mutation of this symbol’s connotation (a while ago, for your information), I was furious. It was entirely unfair that millennia worth of credibility and respect for the swastika was instantly vanquished. The destruction of this symbol by the Nazis may, in fact, be one of the longest-lasting legacies of the Nazi movement, because who knows how long it will take for its original meaning to be restored?
Etymology
The name “swastika” has its roots in the Sanskrit word svastika which refers to a lucky object of sorts. In addition, Wikipedia states that the Proto-Indo-European root svasti means “well-being” or “good,” and that colloquially “swastika” can be translated as “lucky charm.” This makes it a natural choice for any organization (and has been used in logos for several), and the Nazi Party was no exception. The blue swastika you see to the right is the emblem of Lotta Svärd> a Finnish women’s organization formed around the turn of the 20th century at the beginning of the Finnish Civil War. Finland has used the swastika extensively, especially in their Air Force, where it featured until 1945, at which point the connotation of the symbol forced them to change it to a plain blue circle.
Cultural Evolution
Ultimately, the origin of the swastika can be traced back to the East during the Neolithic period, where it was and still is considered a sacred symbol for almost all Eastern religions. For Hindus, it stands for Brahma, the creator, and represents the evolution (and involution!) of the universe. For Buddhists, it represents both eternity and Dharma. The swastika is used very frequently in Jainism and appears on every temple and holy book, and most religious ceremonies start and finish with the creation of a rice swastika. Because of its historic use, the swastika is ubiquitous in southeast Asia.
Most people know some of this. Most people realize that the swastika is still used in Asian cultures, and most people realize that it was also used by the German Nazi Party. However, the swastika’s penetration into old culture goes much further than this. The symbol has been found in the art of the Ancient Greeks, the Danish, the Celtics, the Slavs. And it’s not completely unbelievable — the shape is so simple and so placid that I’m surprised it wasn’t used even more — why wasn’t this symbol embraced by the West? Why do we see it in the history of the Greeks, the Slavs, the Buddhists, the Japanese, but not the British, the French, the Americans, or the Canadians?
Swastika in Montreal
The answer: You’re wrong, and those were trick questions. It was embraced by the West! It only took us until the 20th century to realize its use. For a complete rundown of how the West used the swastika before World War II, check out this Wikipedia article. The symbol was used plenty before the Nazis got a hold of it — especially among WWI aviators as a token of good luck — and can still be found built into numerous historic buildings, including the infamous U.S. Naval base we’ve all seen.
Many symbols have been formed and transformed over the course of human history — the peace sign, hand gestures, the star, the skull, the sword — and many words have gradually lost historic definitions and connotations over time (look in any dictionary for a definition with the word “archaic” next to it), but none, to my knowledge, have been transformed as quickly as the swastika. The Nazis took this double cross, put it in a white disk on a red background, and killed whatever intrinsic good was stored inside.
But alas, not all hope is lost, and I believe ultimately we can restore the original meaning of the swastika. After all, it is used contemporarily in at least half the world, and even in the West it bears significance to obscure religions like Theosophism, Ananda Marga, and Raelism, which shares some of my beliefs towards the swastika (primarily that its historical meaning should be brought back into use). But a task such as this has to be done very carefully, as there are many ignorant people who still associate this symbol with hate (and, no doubt, they have a reason).
I wish for a society of open-minded people who don’t mind disregarding a mere war’s worth of evil connotation for several millennia of good-natured, righteous, spiritual use of the swastika. Personally, I think the swastika is, frankly, a really cool-looking symbol. It’s symmetry and simplicity makes it perfect for use in architecture and all other kinds of art, and, put quite simply, it’s extremely frustrating to have such a universal symbol so restricted. I want to be able to use this symbol, and the only thing stopping me is the Nazis. Just imagine — what if Hitler had chosen the heart? Or the Greek letter pi? Would we choose a different symbol for circular calculations? Would, if he had chosen the heart, have shirts that say “I 卐 NY?”
Since it is illegal in tons of places, try displaying this symbol privately. Tell your guests its story. Let them know it’s alright and make sure party invitations clearly state you’re not a Nazi.
Dear readers, I’m not done here. The swastika and its misuse has deeply influenced me to figure out why, how, and if this can be reversed. Expect more information, more analysis. This symbol is far too revered and far too meaningful culturally and historically to let die. We didn’t say “Ok, Nazis, that’s alright,” when they were killing people, and I don’t think we should let them kill such a pervasive and important symbol such as the swastika either.
Image Descriptions: The red swastika a few paragraphs up is the Boreyko Coat of Arms as used by the Slavs.
If any of you are as addicted to Tolkien and his works as I am, and find yourself constantly pining for new knowledge and insight into his rich and vibrant secondary world of Arda, then have I got a link for you! As I was searching iTunes last week for music inspired by Tolkien (yes, I am that pathetic), I came upon a delightful free podcast by the name of Tolkien Professor.
No, not that Tolkien professor!
Tolkien Professor is done by college professor and Tolkien fanatic Corey Olson, who delights in the world of Tolkien and has made available multiple lectures (currently 10) on various themes found in Tolkien’s work. In addition to several non sequitur podcasts about various issues such as the origin of dragons and whether or not the balrog in The Bridge of Khazad-dum had wings (very important!), he is working through the entire trilogy and the Hobbit, doing an in depth reading and analysis of each work.
The lectures are extremely well thought out, not to mention entertaining, so I highly recommend that you subscribe to the podcast, sit back, relax, and get your nerd on.
Ok, horrible puns (if you don’t get it now, you will by the end of this article) aside, I just want to share a recent trend with all you devoted followers (and apollogize for having disappeared for a few weeks. I was working on a paying movie gig. I’ll write up that story once its all over). A while back I started noticing that there were more and more really nice looking road bikes around in my life and after a bit of research stumbled upon the source of this stylish madness: FIXED GEAR BIKES! So, just to explain: besides being totally awesome looking, fixed-gear bicycles only have one gear in the back (as opposed to a cassette of gears and a deraileur) which is connected directly to the crank in the front. As long as your feet are moving, the bike is too (and vice versa). This means NO COASTING, which leads to some hardcore innovation especially when i comes to skids, which are the only legit way to stop a fixie. And in all this fixie madness I came upon a series of totally awesome videos, which was really the whole point of this post, actually. Nice-ass bikes in nice lookin videos, doin nice ass shit:
MACAFRAMA - an important bay-area fixed group with probably the nicest lookin vids around. Look them up on vimeo and watch all 18 of their 30 second long videos. Soooo good.
MASH SF - Finally another Bay based group who knows how to tear shit up.
Enjoy your trend update! And get a bike.
- Sam
*BONUS TIEM LOLZ!* - the Mash team in Austin friggin Texas bombin down Congress with our man Lance! Super duper video. See how many of the locations you know.
As Jeff recently wrote about one of his pet peeves (the word “talk”), I figured that I would take this chance to TALK to you, the reader, about one of my own pet peeves, something so insidious, so fiendish, that I try to avoid using them like the plague. And not a plague of rainbows, sugar-free candy and racial harmony, but THE plague. The one that killed people. What is this accursed item? Why, none other than the pencil.
So let’s just get started with the pencil as a whole. Pencils are made out of wood-what is this, 1593? When is the last thing a tree ever did good anyhing for me? The answer is never. Trees do nothing but take up room on the Earth. Also, since trees are living things, everytime you buy a pencil, you’re endorsing murder. How do you feel about that? I bet it doesn’t feel too good knowing you’re a mass murderer does it?
It's all fine and dandy to use pencils, until you realize they are hooking your babies on heroin.
Seeing as pencils are made out of graphite, you have to sharpen them. You know what you could do with all of the time you save from not sharpening pencils if you only used pen? Here’s a list of just a few of the things I came up with:
Breathe
Stare at a wall.
Count
Become an existentialist.
But no. You won’t have time to do any of those things, because you are too busy bothering everyone within a 1000 mile radius with the banshe-death screams of a pencil sharpener. And you know who else probably sharpened Pencils? Hitler. He probably used them all the time.
And even worse than normal pencils are mechanical pencils. I don’t know why they were created. It just..boggles my mind. Sure, you no longer have to sharpen them, but at the same time, if you exert even the smallest amount of pressure, the lead breaks. According to Wikipedia, the mechanical pencil was originally invented in 1822. You know what else happened in 1822? The last public whipping was carried out in Edinburgh. You know what I think…Nay, what I KNOW happened? They found an even worse punishment than being whipped. HAVING TO WRITE WITH A FRIGGIN MECHANICAL PENCIL.
Now, allow me to extol the virtues of the pen for a second. First off, everyone knows pens use ink, and ink comes from octopi. And seeing as octopi are nothing more than the undersea puppets of Satan, everytime I use a pen, I feel glad knowing I’m doing my part to make a species become extinct.
Is this what you want to wake up to one day? If you don't start using pens, get ready to say hello to your new octopus overlord.
And then let’s talk about how much more extravagant pens are than pencils. When I imagine a pen, I imagine a thing of elegance, a writer daftly crafting a story of the highest caliber of prose. When I think of a pencil, I think of a brain tumor. The most expensive pencil in the world is valued at $12,800.00. Sure, that may seem expensive, but when put into comparison with the most expensive pen in the world, which costs $730,000, $12,800 seems like the amount of money one would give to a beggar. And just for those of you who didn’t instantly realize, that pen costs 10000000000x more than the pencil.
I could go on for many more pages as to why pencils drool and pens rule, but I think my case has been pretty clearly stated. So, for all you hip cats at there that are down with the jive of pens, way to go. If you use pencils, well, you’re a loser.
Stalin signing something. Not pictured, Stalin killing everyone in Russia.
Today I feel like sharing with all of yous a few short writes I’ve put down on paper lately. Mind you, these aren’t really that refined, and their length makes them more like sketches than stories, but I enjoyed writing them, so I figured I might as well try them out on you.
This first one I got an idea to do when I interpreted the following picture somewhat oddly in my creative writing class at school (it was used as a writing prompt):
All props go to newmexico51 from Flickr for the image.
John sighed, shoved his feet into his black leather boots, and stood up. Walking over to his closet, he pulled out a pair of faded jeans and his favorite flannel shirt. Why did I put my boots on first? he wondered as he struggled to pull the pants on over the boots’ angled heels, his foot straightening out and getting caught halfway up the leg, causing a minor crisis. He debated not wearing pants at all today - no one would see anything anyway. Finally he forced them up, buttoned and zipped them, flung on his shirt and exited the room, walking down the hall towards the cafeteria.
The others have it so easy, he thought, they can turn on and off, choose whether or not to use their gifts. They can walk through civilization if they want to, head held high, no one suspecting their true nature. Of all the freaks on this island, John decided, he had it the hardest. What kind of other life could there be for the Invisible Man?
The other is about a bridge.
This bridge is long. Very long. Just how much time I’ve spent traversing this walkway I’m not certain, but it’s been enough that I can’t remember feeling the sun anymore, or the wind on my face, or laughter.
It’s always dark here, save for the phosphorescent glow of the planks themselves, and the black abyss extends down on either side. I threw a penny over the edge once - after about an hour I gave up on hearing it hit. It is truly horrid here.
At least you’re alright - you are alright, aren’t you? They said that they would take care of you, that they would keep you from harm. All I had to do was cross this bridge and talk to a man on the other side. Of course, I’m realizing now that it’s not so easy as that.
Day after day, I never cease; I don’t even get tired or hungry any more. It drives me so crazy sometimes that I have to walk along with my hat pulled low over my face, just so that I don’t have to look at these sickly green, glowing boards of wood, rotten almost to the point of breaking. And even then I can hear their sinister creaking, like laughter, driven to tears by my torment.
Maybe some day I’ll snap. Maybe some day I’ll do a swan dive off the side, or I’ll leap out from atop the railing like a wrestler about to deliver his finishing blow. Maybe someday I’ll see if this damned pit really does have a bottom. But for now, at least, I’m still content to just walk, and think of your face.
Alright! It’s certainly no Broken Chair Essay, but It’s all I’ve got. As I get back into the habit of writing more often, I’ll start to post things I’ve composed more frequently. I hope you enjoyed reading.
If you’ve not yet heard of Wolfram|Alpha, you just haven’t been reading up on enough of those scientific internet applications recently. It is, in my opinion, one of the most useful and incredible breakthroughs in dynamic input interpreter (or “search engine”) technology since Google. Bing’s got nothing on this shit1.
